life.

theres this guy....and well i kinda like him :) and i feel like i'm in junior high every time he calls me, or texts me. i get a big goofy smile on my face and even my dad notices it. i've known him for awhile and he's became one of my best friends and i honestly can't imagine him not being in my life in the future. lately we've started talking recently about us. and what us is. we've decided that we want to try a relationship. we think it can work. we think we'll be good together. we know everything about each other. he knows what i want to name my kids. i know he shakes his foot when he's falling asleep. HE MAKES ME HAPPY! :)

we haven't had the full relationship talk...we just know we want to try this. i want it to work. he wants it to work. we're gonna have some obstacles in the way but i know we can do this. i've had some friends that think this will never work...and maybe they're right. but then i have the friends that are beyond happy that i have him in my life. thanks guys! :)

dad doesn't like him. he doesn't even know him, but he knows he doesn't like him. mom wants to meet him. she wants him to come stay the night(and sleep on the couch of course!) brother, well he could care less. push comes to shove this guy will always be my friend. he's there for me whenever i need him. he lets me bitch at him just to get it out. he plays psychologist when i need it. he makes me laugh. he makes me cry. he pisses me off. he makes me smile. he makes me feel special.

it's just one more change that is happening in my life right now. i welcome it with open arms. i regret only 1 thing i've done in my life...and i saw that regret tonight. i had mixed emotions about it. part of me was thinking stupid stupid corie. and the other part of me thought you only live once and i took full advantage of what was in front of me and had fun! that living once part of me is what keeps me hopeful and excited about this new change. and i just hope in the end i'm not saying stupid stupid corie, but rather i'm only gonna live once...glad i tried!

The Beginning....

Where oh where to start?! Writing has always been a release for me...especially if I'm getting to write about what I want so I figure why not? Right now is the PERFECT time for me to start this. This is the one thing I can be sure of, and the one thing that I know will make me happy. I'm at that point in my life right now where everyone is asking me what I want to do in a year when I leave Wright State. Do I want to live in Ohio? Are you dating anyone serious? The only answer that I can give for all of these questions that keep getting thrown at me is "How in the hell am I suppose to know???" If you don't like my answer than oh well! (and yes that is even my answer to the dating question) I've gone thru some rough patches recently...REAL rough patches but luckily I've had my amazing friends to help me overcome some of them, but they can't help with it all. Some of it I have to do all on my own, and I don't even know where to begin. I'm 21 years old...life is suppose to be complicated right now -right? But I'm a firm believer that everything happens for a reason so all this craziness going on right now will all work out in the end....I hope :-/ There are few things that are consistent in my life and that includes my TRUE friends, my loving family, my job, and of course that boy that lives in Kentucky that knows how to get under my skin but also makes me laugh :) For now those things are my support system. They've been there for me thru the good, bad, ugly, and stupid. I realized today that the people who I thought were my "really good friends" aren't anymore. But I also realized that the friends that matter are still here for me so thank you! This is going to have to be my release...not because I'm shy, or not outspoken but because seeing my thoughts in words help me to see the light at the end of the tunnel :) Goodnight!